A lot to think about here and I had to listen again/reread. Some thoughts: Guilty! of not always being present in conversations, of waiting to speak rather than really listening. That was true before social media existed so I can’t blame that. I do strive to be a better listener which mostly, for me, means taking time to think about what the person is saying and then taking time to think again before responding. This has been hard for me because I have always felt a need jump in right after someone finished speaking, to show them that I was truly engaged. This is in large part due to a lack of confidence, which is less of an issue as I get older and worry less about people’s perceptions. In terms of skimming, I think there is just so much bombarding us in social media that there simply isn’t the time to not skim; for me, skimming is a process of finding posts I do want to spend more time with. For people a lot younger than me, I do think they have difficulty sustaining attention with and without their phone being present. My boys, 16 & 20, are always on their phones, watching something or listening to music- not really there. My oldest will watch a show on his phone and play video games on his computer at the same time. Why not just enjoy one? Sitting down for dinner together, playing a board game or going for a walk together are ways we reconnect without distractions. But these moments when we are all together are hard to find with their work and social schedules. I watched a TEDTalk the other day with a little girl of about 4 years old explaining to parents that they need to play/interact in simple ways with their children to help them develop. This needs to be explained?!?
I think listening gets us a lot farther than talking. I used to get teased for being so quiet and although I definitely was shy (still am, I suppose) I also just love to listen to others talk. I feel like I glean so many interesting and useful things that way.
As an empath, I also feel someone's energy and then listening to what they have to say is a great way to pull things out of them that they may have bottled up and need to release.
Also, just so you know.... I read every single Signal Fire email. Every week. I don't find the time to chime in as often as I'd like to, but I read everything -- posts and comments -- and it has become something I am constantly looking forward to. Thank you, everyone, for being here!
As a member of the TV Generation, it has taken a lot of practice but I'm getting better at listening. I love the "rewind 15" option available with some online audio. I use it frequently. My mind will sometimes drift to something that is worrying me or a "to do" chore. Love ya Tyler!
YES. You. Are. Right!!!! I feel this all the time!! Like I said recently, I cannot get into TikTok culture or mindless scrolling. I get easily exhausted by social media. I crave real and authentic deep conversation with people. I love listening to people and being listened to. I can absolutely feel it when I’m in a conversation where listening is absent. It’s draining honestly. It’s probably why I’m no good at parties haha. I will always be down in the depths. See you there.
A lot to think about here and I had to listen again/reread. Some thoughts: Guilty! of not always being present in conversations, of waiting to speak rather than really listening. That was true before social media existed so I can’t blame that. I do strive to be a better listener which mostly, for me, means taking time to think about what the person is saying and then taking time to think again before responding. This has been hard for me because I have always felt a need jump in right after someone finished speaking, to show them that I was truly engaged. This is in large part due to a lack of confidence, which is less of an issue as I get older and worry less about people’s perceptions. In terms of skimming, I think there is just so much bombarding us in social media that there simply isn’t the time to not skim; for me, skimming is a process of finding posts I do want to spend more time with. For people a lot younger than me, I do think they have difficulty sustaining attention with and without their phone being present. My boys, 16 & 20, are always on their phones, watching something or listening to music- not really there. My oldest will watch a show on his phone and play video games on his computer at the same time. Why not just enjoy one? Sitting down for dinner together, playing a board game or going for a walk together are ways we reconnect without distractions. But these moments when we are all together are hard to find with their work and social schedules. I watched a TEDTalk the other day with a little girl of about 4 years old explaining to parents that they need to play/interact in simple ways with their children to help them develop. This needs to be explained?!?
I'll see you in the depths, Tyler!!
I think listening gets us a lot farther than talking. I used to get teased for being so quiet and although I definitely was shy (still am, I suppose) I also just love to listen to others talk. I feel like I glean so many interesting and useful things that way.
As an empath, I also feel someone's energy and then listening to what they have to say is a great way to pull things out of them that they may have bottled up and need to release.
Also, just so you know.... I read every single Signal Fire email. Every week. I don't find the time to chime in as often as I'd like to, but I read everything -- posts and comments -- and it has become something I am constantly looking forward to. Thank you, everyone, for being here!
As a member of the TV Generation, it has taken a lot of practice but I'm getting better at listening. I love the "rewind 15" option available with some online audio. I use it frequently. My mind will sometimes drift to something that is worrying me or a "to do" chore. Love ya Tyler!
YES. You. Are. Right!!!! I feel this all the time!! Like I said recently, I cannot get into TikTok culture or mindless scrolling. I get easily exhausted by social media. I crave real and authentic deep conversation with people. I love listening to people and being listened to. I can absolutely feel it when I’m in a conversation where listening is absent. It’s draining honestly. It’s probably why I’m no good at parties haha. I will always be down in the depths. See you there.