Well, I must say that it is a valiant and brave endeavor to be openly addressing aliens we (mostly) cannot recognize, do not communicate with, and can assume do not need a REAL ID-compliant driver's license to travel through our skies… but I’m not gonna worry about it.
Being a trained engineer, it’s hard for me not to wonder why we have not recognized aliens given the science (we know) behind the impact of high speed long distance travel through space, ( Einstein theory of relativity… which tells us that time passes slower for an object moving at high speeds and its predecessor the Lorentz factor where we understand time slows down, lengths contract, and mass increases as an object moves faster and faster).
Think of how big a snowball becomes as it travels faster and longer down a hill…
If the science is correct, one couldn’t miss something traveling the speed of light across our skies. It seems its presence would be as obvious as that light from a freight train coming through your living room window…
And have you thought about if aliens really visited our planet, would they have found any interest to stay, or come again? We know that Earth has experienced five major mass extinction events, just in the last 500 million years. These events, collectively known as the "Big Five", involved a significant and rapid decrease in biological life, leading to the extinction of a large percentage of species. The last being the most spectacular. That was the Cretaceous-Paleogene Extinction (K-T Extinction), which occurred 65 million years ago (caused by a major asteroid impact in the Gulf of “that nameless body of water south of New Orleans”, causing the demise of dinosaurs). 🦖 🦕 👻
All that just to say that if aliens have visited our earth, perhaps they came during one of the periods of extinction and found nothing here of interest ( ie; a lifeless planet). And if most life was extinct, we wouldn’t have been here to recognized their big ass presence nearby ( complimenting Einstein’s theory and Lorentz factor). Nor would they have found a reason to hang around. After all, we must assume the universe is full of intelligent life. Why do we assume that life would be interested in ours? And as for those who say there is evidence hidden by government of alien visits… I’m sorry, but If the government is covering up knowledge of aliens, they are doing a better job of it than they do at anything else.
Even if there were UFO’s/UAP’s around today ( and capable of cloaking/hiding their big ass presence) one couldn’t miss another possibility to explain their disinterest (if they are truly intelligent life forms). If they visited Earth today, they would see the harm that humans have done to the planet during our time here ( between extinction periods) and just assume we are currently engineering a sixth mass extinction event, driven by our own human activities. I mean, we are due for at least another extinction before the sun grows to a red giant and burns up life on earth in as soon as 700 million years. Again, probably not much interest here for aliens to with high intelligence to hang around our Earth.
So there! This is my own convenient theory of alien life passing on visiting/conquering earth that does not contradict science as we know it. They came, in a big way, saw nothing worth staying for… and left.
And depending on when they come again, we likely will have other equally threatening issues of our own existence. Like my college chemistry professor told us more than once; “The fact is we the only life form known in a solar system fueled by a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away on the surface of a combustible gas covered planet surrounded by a significant number of objects in space that are constantly moving and governed by uncontrollable gravitational forces. What could go wrong? So, don’t take life or science too seriously. We will never get out of it alive.”
More satire please. I wrote a similar piece where the aliens demanded to talk to creative people rather than politicians. And the scientific training I've had only fuels my certainty that aliens are among us, but are smart enough to stay hidden in a higher dimension. We are their reality tv. 📺
I can hear your screams in those sighs. Also maybe they are already in contact with the advanced beings of the planet. Beneath the sea. In the ocean depths,where the whales shrug and shake their heads in dismay when asked about their obnoxious, barbaric upstairs neighbours. They’re still so young. We hope it’s just a phase. There is good in them if you look closely. One day they’ll grow out of it and get their shit together we hope, they explain almost apologetically.
Tyler!! This is phenomenal!!! But I would have to add Don’t forget your towel! :-p
THANK YOU! ALWAYS, Always bring your towel.
Very creative. A fun lens to look at the country through.
It was fun to write! I'm so glad you liked it!
Well, I must say that it is a valiant and brave endeavor to be openly addressing aliens we (mostly) cannot recognize, do not communicate with, and can assume do not need a REAL ID-compliant driver's license to travel through our skies… but I’m not gonna worry about it.
Being a trained engineer, it’s hard for me not to wonder why we have not recognized aliens given the science (we know) behind the impact of high speed long distance travel through space, ( Einstein theory of relativity… which tells us that time passes slower for an object moving at high speeds and its predecessor the Lorentz factor where we understand time slows down, lengths contract, and mass increases as an object moves faster and faster).
Think of how big a snowball becomes as it travels faster and longer down a hill…
If the science is correct, one couldn’t miss something traveling the speed of light across our skies. It seems its presence would be as obvious as that light from a freight train coming through your living room window…
And have you thought about if aliens really visited our planet, would they have found any interest to stay, or come again? We know that Earth has experienced five major mass extinction events, just in the last 500 million years. These events, collectively known as the "Big Five", involved a significant and rapid decrease in biological life, leading to the extinction of a large percentage of species. The last being the most spectacular. That was the Cretaceous-Paleogene Extinction (K-T Extinction), which occurred 65 million years ago (caused by a major asteroid impact in the Gulf of “that nameless body of water south of New Orleans”, causing the demise of dinosaurs). 🦖 🦕 👻
All that just to say that if aliens have visited our earth, perhaps they came during one of the periods of extinction and found nothing here of interest ( ie; a lifeless planet). And if most life was extinct, we wouldn’t have been here to recognized their big ass presence nearby ( complimenting Einstein’s theory and Lorentz factor). Nor would they have found a reason to hang around. After all, we must assume the universe is full of intelligent life. Why do we assume that life would be interested in ours? And as for those who say there is evidence hidden by government of alien visits… I’m sorry, but If the government is covering up knowledge of aliens, they are doing a better job of it than they do at anything else.
Even if there were UFO’s/UAP’s around today ( and capable of cloaking/hiding their big ass presence) one couldn’t miss another possibility to explain their disinterest (if they are truly intelligent life forms). If they visited Earth today, they would see the harm that humans have done to the planet during our time here ( between extinction periods) and just assume we are currently engineering a sixth mass extinction event, driven by our own human activities. I mean, we are due for at least another extinction before the sun grows to a red giant and burns up life on earth in as soon as 700 million years. Again, probably not much interest here for aliens to with high intelligence to hang around our Earth.
So there! This is my own convenient theory of alien life passing on visiting/conquering earth that does not contradict science as we know it. They came, in a big way, saw nothing worth staying for… and left.
And depending on when they come again, we likely will have other equally threatening issues of our own existence. Like my college chemistry professor told us more than once; “The fact is we the only life form known in a solar system fueled by a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away on the surface of a combustible gas covered planet surrounded by a significant number of objects in space that are constantly moving and governed by uncontrollable gravitational forces. What could go wrong? So, don’t take life or science too seriously. We will never get out of it alive.”
I agree with ALL OF THIS, and have long assumed, things smarter than us would just know to not waste time or energy trying to fix it. :)
the answer to life the universe and everything is 42 !
Touche! Truly is.
More satire please. I wrote a similar piece where the aliens demanded to talk to creative people rather than politicians. And the scientific training I've had only fuels my certainty that aliens are among us, but are smart enough to stay hidden in a higher dimension. We are their reality tv. 📺
:) That I can do! And I wanna read this piece!
Tyler, were you laughing or fuming as you wrote this?
I’d suggest the entry for Earth would or should probably say “WRONG WAY. GO BACK.”
:) Both? And I completely agree, we'd be a Level 4 DO NOT TRAVEL advisory :)
I can hear your screams in those sighs. Also maybe they are already in contact with the advanced beings of the planet. Beneath the sea. In the ocean depths,where the whales shrug and shake their heads in dismay when asked about their obnoxious, barbaric upstairs neighbours. They’re still so young. We hope it’s just a phase. There is good in them if you look closely. One day they’ll grow out of it and get their shit together we hope, they explain almost apologetically.
You couldn't be more right. It's WEIRD how often I think of what whales think of us hahahaha.
So long and thanks for all the fish!
This is such a creative exercise!! I loved reading this!
Ahh I am so glad! :)
Brilliant!
:) Took a risk with this one!
... and a brilliant one at that.