Guilty as charged. I definitely need the rest. I have to be so intentional to slow down. Then I feel guilty when I slow down. 🤦🏻♀️ I’m going to try. May go for a nap today.
Wow! Thanks for posting this. What a reality check for Sunday morning. It made me realize, even in retirement, I make lists everyday of tasks and goals. And I check that list several times each day to measure progress. Now, as a full time caregiver, there are obvious tasks I need to ensure the health and safety of my partner. But the other things I list are likely feeding my insecurities of maintaining a “productive lifestyle“. I used to stress about the competitiveness of business, but now it seems I am running to remain relevant. Yes, I recognize some of my busyness is also based in the fear of getting older and losing cognitive skills. But (a) reading for pleasure, (b) listening to music and (c) just taking a walk into nature, all are now less prevalent than before retirement. So, thanks for the wakeup call! Amazing, that while we think we are standing our ground sometimes, it turns out our feet are actually on a shifting dune of sand.
For what it's worth, I'm also here for the rambling. Isn't that part of the slowing down and being more restful? This past year for the first time in my life I made it a goal to rest more. To take naps, cancel plans when I need more me time, watch more tv and movies ect. I've managed to do a marvelous job of it. My favorite days are the ones where my phone doesn't need charging at the end. Where I catch both a beautiful sunrise and spectacular sunset. Where I read a good book or play games outside with the neighborhood kids. The ones that have no real purpose other than to feed dopamine to my brain and take a break from the busy world. I do feel guilt about this. My so called friends never let forget that I am the most privileged person and that I should feel guilty. But more than that I worry that indulging in this lifestyle will have me being left behind. That everyone will just leave and I will never again fit into the world I'm supposed to be living in with tasks, jobs, and to do lists. That I will be lonely forever and somehow just become the mythical creepy witch that lives all alone in the forest. 🤷🏻♀️ Here's to everyone finding the right balance. 🍻
I have always been good at stillness. If not of mind, most certainly of body.
When I was recovering from a new hip this past summer, it took me sometime to watch movies in the middle of the day. I could do not much but sit, so why was it so difficult? Then I got it, between my walks around the house and PT, there came movies. Bollywood to begin with. Then playing some catch up to things I hadn't yet seen ... The Mandalorian, for one. What a joy it was to binge through. [ps. I love that spellchecker corrected Mandalorian!]
So, now, on my days off I sit, meander through some social media, listen to music, and Just sit. It's still hard to turn my brain off. Meditation needs to be guided so that I stay on track. So not so quite there either, really.
I love stillness. My left arm has 'Be Still' tattooed there as a reminder [as I am 'god'/universe] right under an OM. I know what needs to be done, so, most of the time, I do it. Gladly.
Yesssss. Nothing recharges me more or feels better than an afternoon nap, yet I always feel guilty doing it. Here's to giving ourselves permission to just be still, not because we "deserve it" after being busy (a story I often tell myself) but because we're human. And we need rest and to just be.
After a busy birthday weekend, I sat in bed yesterday evening and ate cake for dinner and watched some TV shows. I didn't feel guilty at all! and I waited till today to catch up on emails and podcasts and listen to this!
For my birthday on Saturday, I picked up my father-in-law, "Dad" to me, who is 82 years old and took him to the SC State Museum. He's lived here in Columbia, South Carolina since 1965 and had never been. He even supplied and delivered the wood for some beautiful stairs and floors there years ago when they were remodeling the museum, but he'd only been as far as the delivery bay in the back. He was like a kid! It was totally awesome and we will have to go back because we didn't get to see it all. It was better than taking a kid because he could read all the exhibit descriptions and understand them all, LOL. Then I took him to my favorite restaurant and when I mentioned a new movie that was out that he might like, he wanted to go! So I quickly bought tickets and off to the movies we went. Needless to say, it was the busiest birthday ever and I was so glad to enjoy a quiet Sunday evening at home in bed eating cake! The ever thoughtful Jim, had my favorite carrot cake delivered to me from Whole Foods since he was in Dubai!
This is so great thank you. I am learning to slow down as I age and feel the effects of my wicked ways of doing too much (like anxiety, chronic pain, brain fog...). Now, I actually schedule a half a day as "DND" in my calendar: Do Nothing Day. Sometimes a whole day. For some reason it gave me permission to rest if I scheduled it. How weird is that, haha. It has worked well for me. I do work full time, so it is important to give myself downtime every week.
I feel this deeply. I love this piece so much. I have been guilty of this most of my life, but a lot has really shifted for me since the pandemic happened. I was forced to do nothing when I lost my job and it really made me think about my life. That was unbearable for me, but it taught me so much about my worth and my life's purpose. Now that I'm back to a more regular life (but honestly, what is that really, anyway?), I have a different perspective on work/life balance. As of the start of this year, I am now fully self-employed. Although it's terrifying some days, I am truly grateful to be completely in charge of my own life. I am working hard to create balance for myself and establish good boundaries when it comes to my work. Some days I work from the couch. Some days I take long breaks in the middle of the day. Some days I work from random locations because I can (remote work is super awesome). I am really enjoying this new way of life and the flexibility it is allowing me. Even though I still feel all the societal pressures and still get stressed about money and bills and responsibilities...I feel very passionate about self-care and maintaining my quality of life. I'd much rather be poor and happy than well-off financially and miserable in a job or life I don't like.
P.S. My latest hobby that I am having a blast with is doing Sudoku puzzles. I do them every day. For me, that is the thing that slows me down and takes my mind off everything else. I love that I get to challenge myself and keep my brain healthy in a way that is fun!
Guilty as charged. I definitely need the rest. I have to be so intentional to slow down. Then I feel guilty when I slow down. 🤦🏻♀️ I’m going to try. May go for a nap today.
Wow! Thanks for posting this. What a reality check for Sunday morning. It made me realize, even in retirement, I make lists everyday of tasks and goals. And I check that list several times each day to measure progress. Now, as a full time caregiver, there are obvious tasks I need to ensure the health and safety of my partner. But the other things I list are likely feeding my insecurities of maintaining a “productive lifestyle“. I used to stress about the competitiveness of business, but now it seems I am running to remain relevant. Yes, I recognize some of my busyness is also based in the fear of getting older and losing cognitive skills. But (a) reading for pleasure, (b) listening to music and (c) just taking a walk into nature, all are now less prevalent than before retirement. So, thanks for the wakeup call! Amazing, that while we think we are standing our ground sometimes, it turns out our feet are actually on a shifting dune of sand.
For what it's worth, I'm also here for the rambling. Isn't that part of the slowing down and being more restful? This past year for the first time in my life I made it a goal to rest more. To take naps, cancel plans when I need more me time, watch more tv and movies ect. I've managed to do a marvelous job of it. My favorite days are the ones where my phone doesn't need charging at the end. Where I catch both a beautiful sunrise and spectacular sunset. Where I read a good book or play games outside with the neighborhood kids. The ones that have no real purpose other than to feed dopamine to my brain and take a break from the busy world. I do feel guilt about this. My so called friends never let forget that I am the most privileged person and that I should feel guilty. But more than that I worry that indulging in this lifestyle will have me being left behind. That everyone will just leave and I will never again fit into the world I'm supposed to be living in with tasks, jobs, and to do lists. That I will be lonely forever and somehow just become the mythical creepy witch that lives all alone in the forest. 🤷🏻♀️ Here's to everyone finding the right balance. 🍻
I have always been good at stillness. If not of mind, most certainly of body.
When I was recovering from a new hip this past summer, it took me sometime to watch movies in the middle of the day. I could do not much but sit, so why was it so difficult? Then I got it, between my walks around the house and PT, there came movies. Bollywood to begin with. Then playing some catch up to things I hadn't yet seen ... The Mandalorian, for one. What a joy it was to binge through. [ps. I love that spellchecker corrected Mandalorian!]
So, now, on my days off I sit, meander through some social media, listen to music, and Just sit. It's still hard to turn my brain off. Meditation needs to be guided so that I stay on track. So not so quite there either, really.
I love stillness. My left arm has 'Be Still' tattooed there as a reminder [as I am 'god'/universe] right under an OM. I know what needs to be done, so, most of the time, I do it. Gladly.
Thanks for the reminders, Tyler. <3
Yesssss. Nothing recharges me more or feels better than an afternoon nap, yet I always feel guilty doing it. Here's to giving ourselves permission to just be still, not because we "deserve it" after being busy (a story I often tell myself) but because we're human. And we need rest and to just be.
After a busy birthday weekend, I sat in bed yesterday evening and ate cake for dinner and watched some TV shows. I didn't feel guilty at all! and I waited till today to catch up on emails and podcasts and listen to this!
For my birthday on Saturday, I picked up my father-in-law, "Dad" to me, who is 82 years old and took him to the SC State Museum. He's lived here in Columbia, South Carolina since 1965 and had never been. He even supplied and delivered the wood for some beautiful stairs and floors there years ago when they were remodeling the museum, but he'd only been as far as the delivery bay in the back. He was like a kid! It was totally awesome and we will have to go back because we didn't get to see it all. It was better than taking a kid because he could read all the exhibit descriptions and understand them all, LOL. Then I took him to my favorite restaurant and when I mentioned a new movie that was out that he might like, he wanted to go! So I quickly bought tickets and off to the movies we went. Needless to say, it was the busiest birthday ever and I was so glad to enjoy a quiet Sunday evening at home in bed eating cake! The ever thoughtful Jim, had my favorite carrot cake delivered to me from Whole Foods since he was in Dubai!
This is so great thank you. I am learning to slow down as I age and feel the effects of my wicked ways of doing too much (like anxiety, chronic pain, brain fog...). Now, I actually schedule a half a day as "DND" in my calendar: Do Nothing Day. Sometimes a whole day. For some reason it gave me permission to rest if I scheduled it. How weird is that, haha. It has worked well for me. I do work full time, so it is important to give myself downtime every week.
I feel this deeply. I love this piece so much. I have been guilty of this most of my life, but a lot has really shifted for me since the pandemic happened. I was forced to do nothing when I lost my job and it really made me think about my life. That was unbearable for me, but it taught me so much about my worth and my life's purpose. Now that I'm back to a more regular life (but honestly, what is that really, anyway?), I have a different perspective on work/life balance. As of the start of this year, I am now fully self-employed. Although it's terrifying some days, I am truly grateful to be completely in charge of my own life. I am working hard to create balance for myself and establish good boundaries when it comes to my work. Some days I work from the couch. Some days I take long breaks in the middle of the day. Some days I work from random locations because I can (remote work is super awesome). I am really enjoying this new way of life and the flexibility it is allowing me. Even though I still feel all the societal pressures and still get stressed about money and bills and responsibilities...I feel very passionate about self-care and maintaining my quality of life. I'd much rather be poor and happy than well-off financially and miserable in a job or life I don't like.
P.S. My latest hobby that I am having a blast with is doing Sudoku puzzles. I do them every day. For me, that is the thing that slows me down and takes my mind off everything else. I love that I get to challenge myself and keep my brain healthy in a way that is fun!
Oh, I loved this! ☺️