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Taylor Juarez's avatar

This is so beautiful. And so true. I've felt my way through so much pain this last year, but man have I grown to see new things and view life from a perspective I've never had before. I've always thought pain was essential. We have to feel everything in order to really be alive.

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Kristi's avatar

Just getting back to this...and there's so much to be gained by taking the time to examine the pain when going though something that hurts. I recently came to the realization that I had allowed my family (my mom in particular) to be disrespectful and get away with ignoring me or my requests for space, my need for people to not drop in uninvited or unannounced, and to have a genuine interest in things that are important to me. A few weeks ago I was at my daughter's house in the middle of three projects (they recently bought their first home and things needed fixing, painting, cleaning, etc) and my mom walked in the door, uninvited, as she has been known to do. I said "Um, we're very busy in the middle of several things. It's not a great time." She was offended and said "That's no way to greet family!" It was a mess. She later vented to my son, who called to berate me for being rude.

This has been painful to work through, but I've learned a lot...I can't own how then feel about me refusing to be disrespected in this way anymore. I need to be clearer with communication and firm with my needs, and not take on the guilt they're accustomed to putting on me. It's painful realizing that I've allowed them to do this, and healing to move past it.

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